I do like to talk about subjects other than my children, but sometimes it’s nice to sit down with another mother to swap stories and commiserate about our lives and our families. I have found that even if her situation is seemingly worse than mine, there is always empathy, never pity and generally lots of laughter.
One of the never-ending topics is sleep. Every book and every person says something different. At the beginning I read everything I could about getting my son to sleep, keeping him asleep, blah blah blah. The information was as exhausting and confusing as the boy himself. The tiredness that came from that first year is different than anything I’ve ever felt, it’s like a weariness that starts in your core and just radiates through your body. Of course it is getting better, but I cherish every little bit of sleep so much more now for that experience.
So a friend of mine and I had a wonderful talk about our children and their sleeping habits and how they are keeping us up at different times of the night. Her son is generally pretty good but their daughter still keeps them up until 2am or later some days. My eldest does pretty well and sleeps most nights through and the youngest has recently vacated our bed and, barring the occasional nightmare, has been sleeping; well, like a baby. It was nice to find someone in a similar situation where we could be an encouragement to each other.
The only difference is my children are 2 and 4 and her children are 19 and 21. Sigh. Someone tell me there is a break somewhere in there where I DO get some sleep?
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
MEMORIES
Do you have a memory from your childhood that is so random and seemingly unworthy to be remembered but it is solid and fast in your mind, embedded deeply along with the colours and the people and everything about that moment? I have many and I am starting to collect memories of MY children’s childhood that will be just as indelible.
I remember the moment when playing became for real. I remember the exact time when I looked up suddenly in a panic because the house was quiet, the TV was off and the boys were nowhere to be seen – and searching frantically for the damage that was most surely to be done (there is precedence for this feeling of anxiety so I’m not the bad guy here) and low and behold there they are, playing quietly together for over 30 minutes – ALONE. Sweet grace of God.
I will remember when the playing became purposeful and the games and play-acting started to last all day. I know exactly when they started playing together, not just beside each other, but really playing TOGETHER, with themes and processions and roles, and a story and a purpose. When I have a part in the play now, I am only in one act or the narrator or play some other very small part – it is a blessed thing when your children can play independently.
A friend of mine remembers the moment watching her son run – when he stopped running in that awkward toddler gait to a full-out stride of a young boy – a memory the boy will never share but momentous in a mother’s witness to the evolution of her offspring. When she shared that with me, it made me more watchful of the little things – realizing that just because they’ve learned to walk and talk, that there is still so much more, so many more little moments of glory and magnificence if we but take the time to notice!
So, here’s to you and your childhood memories, and another cheers to you and the memories of the stories of your children.
I remember the moment when playing became for real. I remember the exact time when I looked up suddenly in a panic because the house was quiet, the TV was off and the boys were nowhere to be seen – and searching frantically for the damage that was most surely to be done (there is precedence for this feeling of anxiety so I’m not the bad guy here) and low and behold there they are, playing quietly together for over 30 minutes – ALONE. Sweet grace of God.
I will remember when the playing became purposeful and the games and play-acting started to last all day. I know exactly when they started playing together, not just beside each other, but really playing TOGETHER, with themes and processions and roles, and a story and a purpose. When I have a part in the play now, I am only in one act or the narrator or play some other very small part – it is a blessed thing when your children can play independently.
A friend of mine remembers the moment watching her son run – when he stopped running in that awkward toddler gait to a full-out stride of a young boy – a memory the boy will never share but momentous in a mother’s witness to the evolution of her offspring. When she shared that with me, it made me more watchful of the little things – realizing that just because they’ve learned to walk and talk, that there is still so much more, so many more little moments of glory and magnificence if we but take the time to notice!
So, here’s to you and your childhood memories, and another cheers to you and the memories of the stories of your children.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
AM I THE ONLY ONE?
As a mother, sometimes I wonder if I am the only one…
1. Who has 5 items on my grocery list before I’ve finished unpacking my groceries from my current trip?
2. Who wonders where my body went?
3. Who irons my baby clothes?
4. Whose young ones take every opportunity to stick their hands down my shirt?
5. Who can bench press 200 lbs with one arm (the one I hold the baby in) but has tendonitis in the other?
6. Who has called one of the kids by the dog’s name?
7. Who has a hard time switching off the “mommy voice”?
8. Who has screwed up the whole disciplinary process and paid for it for weeks by openly laughing at the child sneezing milk out his nose?
9. Whose kid can properly order, in the right sequence, his Starbucks request? (kid’s soy steamed milk with whipped cream)
10. Who dreams of carrying a purse that is too small to put a diaper in?
11. Who feels like she’s getting a gift when she gets to go to Walmart ALONE?
12. Whose kids have more and better clothes than I do?
13. Who could make a meal just eating the food that falls off my kids?
14. Who falls in love with my husband every time I see him cuddling one of our boys? (well, hopefully I am the only one who falls in love with MY husband, but you get the point…)
15. Who jokes about ironing my baby clothes?
1. Who has 5 items on my grocery list before I’ve finished unpacking my groceries from my current trip?
2. Who wonders where my body went?
3. Who irons my baby clothes?
4. Whose young ones take every opportunity to stick their hands down my shirt?
5. Who can bench press 200 lbs with one arm (the one I hold the baby in) but has tendonitis in the other?
6. Who has called one of the kids by the dog’s name?
7. Who has a hard time switching off the “mommy voice”?
8. Who has screwed up the whole disciplinary process and paid for it for weeks by openly laughing at the child sneezing milk out his nose?
9. Whose kid can properly order, in the right sequence, his Starbucks request? (kid’s soy steamed milk with whipped cream)
10. Who dreams of carrying a purse that is too small to put a diaper in?
11. Who feels like she’s getting a gift when she gets to go to Walmart ALONE?
12. Whose kids have more and better clothes than I do?
13. Who could make a meal just eating the food that falls off my kids?
14. Who falls in love with my husband every time I see him cuddling one of our boys? (well, hopefully I am the only one who falls in love with MY husband, but you get the point…)
15. Who jokes about ironing my baby clothes?
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