ADVICE

My mom used to say... Yes, I have become the mother of repetitive phrases. Praying that some of them stick. "Take a deep breath and take a step back" - this is my answer for anger. The breath gives you a moment to collect yourself and the step back, well, that's because your body seriously wants to do SOMETHING, like hitting the brother, so this gives it something to do; hopefully avoiding the brother, or at least putting you a little out of range, so when you swing, you'll miss. (I try). In addition to that I've had to add a new one - Tyler came home from school and said that anger made you stronger because one of the kids at school (sigh), had stronger muscles when he was angry. so.... "Control makes you stronger than anger". Thank God for Tae Kwon Do and Master Smith - the perfect example. Does Master Smith stay in control? yes. Is he the strongest person ever? yes. Think about it. Well, that should hold them until they watch the HULK. This next one ties into the but-the-kids-at-school hubbledeefubble. "At the end of the day - you have to look YOURself in the mirror". Whatever the others do, wrong or right, you have to make your own choices and YOU have to live with them. This is a new one, but I don't think it will be the last time I say it. They are starting to make their own choices but I can only give my children tools to handle situations, to make good decisions, and to discern right/wrong. One I haven't used yet but I firmly believe in: "be thrifty with things and generous with people.

TYLER'S SCHOOL

So Tyler has ideas of starting schools - whatever is most interesting to him at the moment, he will start a school for that. The first one was a construction school for 4 year olds (he was 5 at the time). He would teach them every Saturday to build bridges, but don't worry mommy, he said, we'll start with something easy - just a suspension bridge. As we are currently in a nerf-gun phase of a young boy's life - Tyler is going to set up a bullet dodging school. So he made up what you are called at every level of your training... Level one: first day-er Level two: beginner level three: dodger Level four: Better level five: end-er level six: end-er plus

PARENTHOOD

My letter to a friend It is so awesome to see how excited you are to be a parent and I believe you will be a most awesome father. I am giving you unsolicited advice. Get quiet and really let God prepare you for this – having a child will teach you in a way you can’t imagine about God’s love for you (I seriously don’t know how God didn’t wipe out mankind after the first slash on Jesus’ back) and for that fact alone it is worth it. You will never agin be able to say “I just want to…” or “my plan is to…” or anything that starts with “me” or “I”. Every trial and hardship is magnified one hundredfold because you are responsible for someone incapable of being responsible for themselves. They will always want to be fed – especially when you want to go in a corner and cry. You will never get to feel sorry for yourself again – ever – you can’t – it is no longer allowable, not even once. You will be pushed to your limit physically, mentally and spiritually and every day you have to be one step ahead. You do not get to relax or you will fail. This is harsh – parenting is harsh – it is forever – it is serious and requires a level of selflessness and faith that I never thought possible. You will see yourself imbedded in another person – all your faults and quirks in full force without the years of softening and you can see the pain and trials this will bring to another through no fault of their own but rather by genetic design and the choices YOU have made for them. Your choices now affects someone else directly and your mistakes are open wounds on an innocent face. You will never be “ready” to have children – you will only be ready to be obedient to God – ask Him to show you His ways and teach you his paths. They will; however, fetch the remote control for you.

GHOSTS???

Do you believe in ghosts? Honestly – when it comes right down to it – what do you really feel about this? My youngest told me this morning that he saw a shadow that looked kind of like me walking across the room and then disappeared. It wasn’t a shadow from the window or in the closet – it was like “something that walks a few steps and then disappears” Wow – the child can’t lie – he isn’t delirious – it was 6am and dark outside and he had just snuggled himself in our bed but he was awake. What do you think then when your child believes. Me, I have a healthy respect for the spirit world and believe that our battle isn’t against flesh and blood… Still, Prayed the blood of Jesus Christ over my house let me tell you…

NUMBERS

It's all about the numbers right now. Tyler is 6 and loves loves loves the numbers. Time is now 60 seconds is one minute and minutes to hours. We count down days. At night Steve and Tyler do math at the table, thinking up equasions to trick each other. They are on division right now and a little bit of algebra. We are a bit totally way past 2 boys plus 3 girls equals 5 children. It's more like 500 dump trucks plus how many bulldozers equals 962 pieces of equipment? Yesterday Tyler got on the scale and informed us that he weighs 50 pounds! and then he got really excited and as he put it - now I'm halfway to mommy's weight. Dead silence in the house until my very handsome and wise husband said "yes, that's absolutely correct Tyler". Yah, he's totally my favourite son right now!

On a very rainy April 26, 2012 (Hope this is the end - they only have 1 pair of socks left without holes in them!) and Steve is walking with Tristan into the Dayhome and this is their conversation: "Look daddy,a worm" take a step "Look daddy, a worm" take a step (repeat) (repeat) (repeat) (repeat)

LEGACY

The continuance of family has been made so clear to me this week. How life repeats itself and how vital family is. I found myself at the beginning of this week out for coffee with my father and had a wonderful time - the only wonderful type of time you can have with someone who knows you inside out and where you don't have to say everything you're thinking but you want to and it's full of comfort and love. Later this week I found myself sitting across the coffee shop table from my son - with the same wonderful time and the same comfort and love.

I remember my grandfather waiting in the car in the church parking lot after church waiting for my grandmother. I also remember my father waiting in the same church parking lot, napping or praying the car waiting for me to finish my youth event so he could drive me home. And on Tuesday night I waited in the church lobby for my son while he was at a church event having a delightful time! I guess it's my turn to drive and wait and pray and I will do so with joy and ferverent prayers and lots and lots of love that I have from generations of loving parents and grandparents and aunts and uncles. thank you all for such a legacy.