LIFE CHANGES

My son broke a plate the other day forcing me to sweep in the deep dark corners of my kitchen. It got me thinking how very very different things are now with children, not just my life, but my attitude and, what was very obvious – my new level of tolerance for cleanliness, or lack thereof.

Having children is, in my opinion, one of three things in life that changes your soul – your core values, how you view life, yourself and others. It’s amazing how having a small child can affect every part of your life.

I gave up coffee when I was trying to get pregnant and then, the worst came, I had to give up all coffee related establishments when I actually did become pregnant – the smell, oh the nausea. I remember that that was how I first knew I really was pregnant; we were in Whistler and I was walking around the village and went into the fudge shop to get myself a little holiday treat, took one step in, turned around and just about lost my lunch and beyond. Everything smelt stronger, and shoddier.

I gave up questionable herbal teas, hot tubs, alcohol and looking at my feet. My house is now the last thing on my to-do list and napping is the first. The other day I actually sat, just sat and held my youngest son while he slept amidst a room full of toys and a kitchen full of dirty dishes. THIS has been the biggest change and a surprisingly easy adjustment. Normally an extremely neat and tidy person, my house resembles controlled chaos and I like to think that I’ve become a little bit more relaxed.

Growing up, I would always do my chores first and play after. My older sister, would read first and well, actually, she would read later too, because I had become frustrated that she hadn’t done her chores, which needed to be done in order for me to finish mine, that I most times ended up doing her tasks too. Anyways, my point would be that priorities have shifted from upkeeping a prestine home, to trying to keep up enough that feet don’t completely stick to the floor. Fun comes first and chores are mixed within those. We clean, but we sing while we clean.

From the way I eat, to the way I talk (sometimes “mommy” voice doesn’t turn off as easily as it should), to the choices I make, the stretch marks are not the markers of my mommyness, my fundamental nature has changed and I am a messier person for it.